On Thursday the 3rd of April, the bride's sister brought me to the church where the religious ceremony was taking place so that I could help with the decorating.
It was a fun group that had gathered and I really hit it off with the groom's sister as well as the groom's witness for the legal ceremony, his best friend from college who is a girl. (Everyone was joking around about the difference in American culture and Dutch culture when it comes to choosing a "wedding party", with the groom in the USA having a "Best Man" but that role not existing in The Netherlands. I think he chose the best "Man" for the role, though, because she was really good and troubleshooting and multitasking, as well as paying attention to the little details.)
The 3 of us were climbing on tables and such, trying to hanging streamers and making everything look even.
Then the groom's witness and I found ourselves with the task of trying to figure out how to get the table cloth paper rolls onto the long sets of table, while battling dull scissors and the paper's affinity for ripping at the most inopportune places. We were victorious and the bride ultimately approved it and in a very Dutch manner of bluntness said, "I like it and it's perfect, so no stress!"
The others had asked me if it was weird being surrounded by a foreign language and I realized that actually it wasn't a big deal, because I was still jet-lagged and while my brain could soak up the tones of the Dutch language, I didn't have to worry about keeping track of what everyone was saying. I just focused on my tasks and if someone needed me specifically, then English would be spoken.
The bride and groom dropped me off at their new house and they were cool enough to get me a frozen pizza that was called "Big American with Bacon" - so much for my ode to bacon on my last day in the USA! It's hard to find bacon in the typical American style when in Europe, and here on my 2nd day I was able to devour a pizza with the authentic product.
They already had plans with each of their families on the final night as single people, so I thought about going to bed early. But my suddenly I was wide awake at 8pm their time and unable to close my eyes until close to midnight. Funnily enough, the bride was also awake and active on Facebook. She and I teased each other with the obvious "Shouldn't YOU be asleep by now?" and then made a pact to turn off the electronics and really get some sleep.
In the morning, the bride's cousin/best friend/witness picked me up and took me to her house which was within walking distance of the first official ceremony. She was really cool and we were alot of like - both loving the color teal/aqua, both playing flute, enjoying the same type of food, etc.
And now onto my Dutch Wedding crash course of typical/acceptable wedding day events:
The bride and groom have a photo shoot first thing in the morning after dressing.
Then they have a family meal with their immediate relatives - grandparents, parents, siblings.
Next comes the Legal ceremony. It takes place at a courthouse with a judge specifically trained in presiding over marriages. Only about 25 people in addition to the couple and their witnesses can fit in the room.
The groom and the bride each have 2 witnesses to sign the certificate. Gender plays no part - you pick the 2 people who you most want to have stand with you in agreement. They each had their mothers as well as the person they considered their best friend.
The ceremony last 30-45 mins and was completely in Dutch. The judge told the story of how they met (I understood the part about their engagement, which made me proud of myself) and then they did the vows. After that, they were advised on 10 keys to help have a successful marriage. The judge was very personable and funny and she kept the whole room in joyful spirits the whole way through.
After that, there was the traditional photo shoot with all the different combinations of family and guests.
Then we went onto the church. Each step increased the amount of people participating. An Italian buffet was offered to those who were invited to this portion. It was also tradition to rotate seats throughout the meal so that different people would end up sitting with the bride and groom. The majority of the time I sat with the bride's cousins and their friends, a family from Portugal, who they had met through mission work. They were the only other ones who didn't speak Dutch, but the parents were fluent in English so we enjoyed getting to know each other. The 2 boys actually go to a German school, so they speak Portuguese, German, and some English. The older one's birthday was the next day and he was turning 12, and we were a lot alike with our preferred hobbies. The younger was 8 or 9 and a ball of energy and kept trying to teach me the German and Portuguese words for different things.
After the meal was over and the tables put up, the 3 of us wound up in a game of Keep-Away/Monkey-in-the-Middle. It gave their parents a break and I had a lot of fun with it. It was fun to bond around the language barrier.
During the cake cutting, which had speeches, as well as during the part where the family talked about the couple's lives leading up to their marriage, I was able to be near the groom's witness and she did a marvelous job translating/giving me the overview of what was being said.
When it came time for the religious service (where more people arrived), first had planned to sit with the bride's witness/cousin so she could help me understand little parts that were important. But I accidentally missed the cue for sitting and made to a seat minutes before the ceremony began.
They don't have wedding parties for this portion - just the minister on stage, with the couple sitting at the front of the audience until it's time to exchange vows. So very basic and focused on the couple's new life together.
There were songs to sing as a group through out the ceremony, and during one of those I was able to catch the eye of the groom's witness who was now "off duty" and just sitting among the crowd, and was able to move next to her. I didn't need her to translate the whole thing, just the parts that were off-script/improvised.
After the ceremony was over, there was a receiving line for all the guests. Then it was onto the final location for the day - the after party! Even more people were at this part and it was really fun. Lots of tasty (and unique) finger foods and a big dance floor. The bride and groom had a first dance, which turned into an evolution of dance routine - so cute and hilarious. The final song in the set was "Harlem Shake" and a bunch of us jumped in at the proper moment for an epic dance party.
I mostly hung out with the groom's friends from college. Most of them were fluent in English and we had fun talking as well as dancing. The guys tried to help me with my goal to try Dutch beers, but some how I wound up with 2 different Blond Belgian beers instead! When we were trying to think of the word for a specific flavor in the beers, the internet connection was not on our side and turned what should have been a simple activity into 15 min + attempt and trying to figure out a way to translate from Dutch to English. But all in good fun, just added to the list of memorable moments.
One of the girls loves dancing and when she saw me doing some of the things I've learned from my home dance scene, she asked me to teach her some moves! We had a blast jamming out. She picked up on things quickly, since she had taken lessons in a lot of different styles, so it was a really positive, enjoyable night.
The 2 boys from Portugal were living it up on the dance floor, especially the younger one. He and I had a lot of fun teasing each other and running around. The bride and groom prepared for exit right at midnight, so I joked with the older one that all the Sparklers being lit were just to celebrate his birthday that had now arrived.
After the sparkler farewell, there was Frites with Mayo galore! (Huge french fries, like British chips style) and of course a bit more dancing. We got home somewhere around 2 AM I believe.
I had a 12:05pm ticket out of the city for the following day, so I did get some sleep and made it to the station with plenty of time. I went to the service desk and the attendant was able to print me out the itinerary for the day, which was a huge help because it saves time when you know what your connection Number and Platform is when trying to rush. And it turned out my first transportation was actually a bus to a different train station. I'm direct to one bus, stow one 2 heavy bags and sit down. Then everyone is told that it will actually be a different bus going. So I have to upload and go to another bus and stow the bags. Once again, we're told that while this bus goes to the other station, it makes stops, so if we're actually needing the direct connection, to get on this OTHER bus. Third times a charm, but all of this confusion among the schedules causes this correct bus to leave late. I'm trying to not get to concerned as I look over my schedule and see how rapidly the departure time for my next connection is arriving. We get near the station with 2 minutes to spare, BUT the little car in front of the bus is letting every pedestrian cross and delaying the bus from turning the corner to pull into it's official docking space. We finally park at the exact time my train is due to leave! Luckily a couple with a child was also catching the train to Düsseldorf and one of them was able to run fast and catch the train from leaving. We all made it on as fast possible. I then spent at least half of the ride trying to slow my heartbeat. Other than that, all the connections went smoothly, I was just paranoid about missing them, so didn't really allow myself to do any shopping. At this second stop, I met an Iranian who was studying at an English university in the city. We empathized with the other over not understanding German and talked a bit about our home towns.
The train with the longest travel time had a cafe so I figured that was the safest way to get a meal and not juggle luggage. The cashier who spoke English was actually half South African so I practiced the one sentence I had learned from my South African friends and we had a fun chat.
When I arrived in Munich/München, I wish I had not been so rushed once in this "layover" because it turned out I had plenty of time before my train departed, but once I was sitting on it, I didn't want to wrestle my luggage again to get on and off since I was so tired.
At my next stop, I was luckily to run into an Austrian girl who was able to help me figure out which train to get on since the station had a notice about a change in schedule. We enjoyed chatting and I wrote down the AuPair website for her in case it was something she might like since she was looking for a job in between semesters.
I arrived on time at the Innsbruck station and the dad was waiting close to my exit door, so it was perfectly timed and onward we went.
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